Labels: Victory
Review by: Andy Malcolm
This record is evil. Digusting. Putrid. Flaccid. Derisory. Diabolical. And I am not even using a thesaurus here. Ok, so I am going overboard on the adjectives, but why the fuck not. There is not ONE PERSON, not a singular individual, reading Collective-Zine who will want to own this CD. And if there is, then get the fuck off my website, ok? You snivelling little wretch, listening to pop punk that has come out of a cookie cutter so worn that the shape (probably a star) is no longer distinguishable. 10 tracks of music so ridiculously by the book that these guys could probably recite said book word for word, backwards, and if they learned a foreign language, they could even translate it into that without having to refer back to the original material even once. CHRIST. They aren’t even pretty. What’s up with that? Ugly boys playing cutesy pop punk that a certain demographic gets wet for. How quaint. How are they supposed to get wet for a bunch of dudes who look like they play Dungeon & Dragons on a Tuesday night, but not in a cool way with like long hair or beards or wearing armour. Just boring fuckers who sit around and moan about their +3 Sword of Bland Pop Punk.
Being fair for a moment though, I must say that the band can both:
a) sing
b) play their instruments
So if you’re the kind of person who likes music played by people who can do both a&b, then shit, this is the band for you! They both sing and play their instruments, they’ll fit in great with the other great bands that sing and play their instruments in your extensive CD collection!
It’s not even important. Not remotely. This band is irrelevant, they have no point. They will sell a few copies of their CD to fans of slick pop punk and then disappear. It is life, life features so many irrelevancies. Shit just happens. It drifts by. Some twat in Essex says “Whatever”. And so it goes. At the same time I understand why someone would want to listen to this, and also I feel empty inside that people could make music that posesses so little passion and soul and be happy to put it out there. What makes someone do that? I guess they just have a different idea of what music is than I do. Fair do’s.
Why did I even write so many words. They made this CD and sent it to me on purpose, to make me look stupid. 🙁