Labels: Reaction Records
Review by: Graeme Cunningham
I’ve always thought I had a great nose for shite. I can smell shite a mile aff. I can smell shite when it walks up on stage before it opens its mooth or strikes its first chord. There is no disguising a shite. You can dress it up like a socialite, but its still just a shite in an
expensive frock. I don’t think I’m alone. Most people, at least the ones I rate, can smell shite just like I can. A lot of the time, they smell the odour before they even ken what’s happening. You’ll see the nose twitch and a grimace will appear on their face and their head will start turning to locate the source of the “shite”.
Before I even opened the package this promo CD came in, I was gagging. It was horrid. The smell of shite wafting from envelope was eye watering. From the reek, I thought Andy had managed to squeeze Bono himself into a jiffy bag. I tried to listen with open ears. I really did. But when something smells like shite and looks like shite, you ken
there is a massive chance that it will in fact be shite. So, with my dinner fighting back up in my throat I subjected myself to this two track promo. Seriously, a eunuch marching band would have more bollocks than this squad of marshmallows. I know punk means a lot of things to a lot of different people but surely it doesn’t mean this to anyone? It makes busted sound like Extreme Noise Terror. Reemer (for that is their name) even have the cheek to call this single Maniac. I’ve seen more “manic” behaviour from a giant sloathe. My mum wouldn’t listen to this, she’d say “what’s this shite?” and my mum doesn’t even approve of such language.
Just in case the CD itself wasn’t ENOUGH reason to hate these plebs, they chuck in the information that they did in fact make a guest appearance in Hollyoaks! Damn. In that case Half of collective-zine probably already own it.
Shite.